It Is About the Eyes, Silly….

When I am at a loss for words, I sometimes just watch people.  As I watch them, I look at their facial features; I pay attention to what they are doing; and their surroundings.  But I pay closest attention to the eyes.  Sometimes, I can tell or sense when that person is experiencing some kind of pain.  It is aid that the eyes will never lie.  It has also been said that the eyes are the gateway to the soul.  I think there is truth to both statements.  And if that is the truth, then we should all be doing more to reach out rather than pulling back.

When you look at the mirror, what do you look at?  Do you ever look at your eyes?  It seems to me that I look tired all the time.  The unfortunate part is that many agree with that.  I am conscious of the fact that I have those proverbial “bags under my eyes.”  This is something that my father blessed me with.  I inherited these “bags” from him.  And I am not going to spend $5000 to or more to remove these “bags”.  Besides, I earned the right to have these “bags.”

We talk about masks and our collective inability to see the “real person.”  Very rarely are people capable of masking what is going on inside.  As I write, I see the eyes of a mother looking concerned about not seeing her child.  The child is playing somewhere amongst other children.  I see people who are on their smart phones either texting or talking.  I see still others who seem distracted or mentally somewhere else.  Perhaps, they are worrying or maybe just daydreaming.  All of these behaviors are forms of communication.

So, when I am talking or conversing, I make eye contact.  If I can’t make eye contact, I have to assume that something is not right.  And that something is either some for of pain, lack of trust, or interest.  Perhaps, the pain is probably anger, or it may be fear.  In any case, the eyes have it–they will communicate the truth.  I am never entirely sure why people attempt to avoid eye contact.  Maybe it’s just knowing that the behavior, in and of itself, is telling.


  1. The eyes is the window to the soul.”
    Very true. I’ve learned more about people by looking them in the eyes when talking. You can tell when a person is lying, hiding, or being truthful. It’s amazing how so small an organ can package one’s personality and the essence of being neatly.
    Perhaps we must learn to pay more attention to one another.

    Your last line is a very apt summary. The action is telling.


  2. If I may add my 2 cents, I hate eye contact, I hate letting people see my pain and angst and sadness, its to intense for me, they can see my soul. Usually it takes a lot of time for me to be able to trust and finally see them dead on eye to eye, its a scary thing for me. But thats why they say, the eyes are the window to the soul.


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